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Comments:
Assuming the best, if it's not about sex on his part... is he really really lonely or did you have some pretty outstanding dates?
I'm the type that always questions other people's motives, though, which is one reason why I like to get different perspectives like this. Doesn't mean I won't talk to her, but when I do I'll have a better clue as to what she's thinking or at least some idea of what goes on in other people's heads.
A widower since late 2013, I'm just starting to come out of my shell and start living.
Fast forward through several big arguments over the issue, she told me out of the blue that she would quit, which was an extremely pleasant surprise for me. I did say I couldn't be with her if she didn't tone it down, but never "forced" her to quit.
You will be glad to know that I went to my therapist today. She tells me she is very proud of me for not settling, and going after the life that I want, but at least giving it a chance! Even though he did say the things he did, which I acknowledge were red flags, it was because I had high hopes that it would work out despite them. That isn't smart, but I'm not going to beat myself up for it forever. I think 'rushing' into the relationship as we did was not smart, and impulsive. It did move pretty fast from the start, and in hindsight I would not have committed fully to him unless I got to know him better and found out some core compatibility issues prior to sex and exclusivity. We didn't sleep together until 6 weeks, and talking daily, and asking me to be exclusive... which I think is GOOD, but was not good is that I didn't get to know the core compatibility issues before I agreed to either sex or exclusivity.
The guy that we met was incredible. 6'2", 250 pounds of Michelin Man muscle, works as a special unit cop. We are the same religion, same politics, same family background and structure, same education, same sense of humor, enjoy the same food, same music - you get the point. Core values AND social compatibility. And yes, the sexual chemistry was insane. Suffice to say we had mad passion and a great connection.